The top 3 reasons why men don't have a consistent daily time with God

The top 3 reasons why men don't have a consistent daily time with God

September 26, 2020

Men are notoriously bad at having a daily time with God. Call it whatever you want; Bible study, quiet time, daily devotional - men struggle with consistently doing this (or maybe it's just me...)

Read below, or watch the video about it:

Here are the top three reasons why men are bad at having a daily quiet time:

1. We are impatient and want results now.

When I start doing something I want to see results, and I want to see them fast. This is one of the reasons why guys like projects that are hands-on; immediate feedback and results.

Sitting and reading the Bible or trying to pray can feel awkward. It gets even worse when we don't feel like we are seeing results. Results are the fuel that keep men going, and without more immediate feedback, we struggle to stay interested.

2. It isn't fun.

Sometimes men can wait on results if the process is fun. Too often, the thought of sitting down and praying or reading the Bible just doesn't sound like something we really want to do. We consciously know we ought to do it, but that is very different than wanting to do it. Without this excitement or prospect of fun, guys have trouble staying engaged.

3. We are too busy, or at least not intentional enough.

During the course of our day, so many things are happening to us that by the time we get to the end of the day most guys want to do something fun and relaxing. We work, take care of our families, wives, children, we fix things around the house, and work on our list of random projects that aren't done yet. And we fill the slots with simple mindless online entertainment - sports, YouTube, instagram, googling random things, browsing eBay, playing COD mobile on our phones (or again....maybe this is just me...)

Most guys try to fit time with God into their existing day, rather than setting up some scheduled time with God and then moving their schedule around that.


So how can men get better?

Any one of the above obstacles is enough to derail a man trying to get serious about spending daily time with God. All three combined are enough to torpedo the intention before it even gets going.

Here are some things that I've personally done that have helped me overcome inertia and get better (not perfect) at being consistent with God.

1. Find some small things that can give you immediate results.

Instead of having a picture in your head of some grey-haired monk that has it all together, whose prayers are answered immediately, who is wise and calm - throw that vision out the window: at least for the short term, as that is a LONG way off for most men.

Become PROCESS oriented, not RESULTS oriented.

View it as a win to have read/listened to at least one chapter of the bible. View it as a win to have written down something you are thankful for. View it as a win to have spent at least 60 seconds trying to memorize one bible verse that is important to you.

Who cares if it takes you a month to see results, the results are that you are doing it. 

2. Build in a ritual that is enjoyable, and start small.

At first, just chalk it up as OK that you don't find it fun to sit there and try to pray. It technically isn't about it being fun. But that doesn't mean you can't make the PROCESS fun.

I have a nice coffee cup, make myself some good coffee, and make my favorite oatmeal before I sit down to do my daily devotional. Sometimes if I am not feeling very enthusiastic I will read a page or two of an interesting christian book to get me moving in the right direction before I even pick up the Bible. (right now I am reading Business by the Book, by Larry Burkett - old school biblical business book written in the early 90s)

I enjoy all those things, and they make me happy. Finding some things like this will make it easier for you to look forward to the scenario in which you will have your quiet time.

Get creative. Use a super nice pen that you like, write in a journal that you handcrafted a leather cover for, etc.

3. Multi-task to help get the ball rolling.

If you are super busy, and feel it is impossible to set aside 15 or 20 minutes a day - just start by multi-tasking for a while to get your feet wet.

Instead of listening to the Joe Rogan Experience on your drive to work every morning, say you won't listen to it until you've listened to at least one chapter of the bible on audiobook (the popular Bible apps on your phone will read to you).

You aren't getting rid of Joe "Jamie, pull up that chimp" Rogan, you are just slightly delaying him. You'll be surprised to find that often you will end up listening to more than one chapter, but don't guilt yourself if you only listen to one.

Find something you can slightly delay in order to squeeze in a quick prayer, 3 minute Christian youtuber, etc.


Enjoy the Process

Make the process as enjoyable as possible, and over time you will start to enjoy the related activities more as well. Don't beat yourself up for not doing enough when you first start trying to improve; view it as a binary 1 or 0. If you did anything, that is a success, no matter how small it way. Stack up enough 1s, and over time your random in-car bible listening will be a habit.

Good luck. Do the hard thing. Enjoy the process. Get started now.

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